Im silently hurted again.....?

Im not sure whether im just a sensitive + emotional gurl..or this is just a common feeling for gurl..i learned a lot to be a positive thinkerz...open minded...self esteem..self confidence...but when d times come...my real xuer + d knowledge crashed!...i dunno who's true...should i be like this...should i act like that...to whom should i tell...to whom should i seek for advice..??...i have no answer...may be d answer is in me,myslf n i...but im afraid if my decision could lead to something bad for me..i need someone to listen...i need someone to talk...i need someone who can understand wut i feel...guide me if im wrong...

Last nite, i went out for dinner with him...I just wore a simple dress...my giordano t-shirt, levis jeans and my pair of slipper..i dun think i should dress up coz we just only went for dinner at "gerai" in bangsar (near to my house area)...to see him is d greatest time i have ever even we meet almost everyday...but lastnite i think gonna have a lot of story especially on how was my interview session going on...

A long d journey to Bangsar, he told me a story on his friend just broke up with his GF coz he feels he has no love feeling towards d gurl...the reason is coz he prefer 'pretty girl' (vougee da vass agaknye..)...his ex has everything..but not pretty enuff (i guess)...

Then i asked him (my bf) "You also have a good taste on girl what (because he likes to gaze at pretty gurl even infront of me!)..you like pretty girl...then why you chose me?" (my intention is just try to test him..i wish..as my bf he will say.."because u r pretty for me ...thats why.." ={ )...Then he simply reply .."Yea true...thats why my friend was shocked...they said im totally changed!" GULLPPP!!...

Whose heart wont stop beating if they heard their bf saying this to them???...the words never say im not pretty to him but the meaning describe it...(or im just misunderstanding?)...At that time i felt so down...but he never noticed or concerned on wut i feel...may be for him its nothing...(is he not sensitive enuff or just ignore it?)

Frankly speaking, the conversation just ruined all my mood that nite..but i try to build up my self confidence...i know im not that suck such i think what he means...i whispered to my heart..."dun worry xue...i believe u r pretty"...hahah...playing around with my heart just wanna comfort d hurt...but hurt is still hurt...no matter how i comfort my self im still hurted...so i decide to keep silent and stay calm...i hope d silent will tell...but i think its not...:(

we had d dinner as usual..but no one of us try to start any topic...just one question with one answer...suddenly he asked me "why u wear like this (simple dress as described above) tonite?"...he seems unhappy to see me dress like this...am i not looking good in this simple dress??

Omigosh..I was...arghhhhhhhhhhh...totally out of mood...but i force myself to smile...macam2 ada playing in my head...now everything is wrong about me..his story about his friend just now resound in my head...am i d next??

There are so many voice within...some says...calm xue...think positive ok...some says...huh watta hell he just simply talk to me like that...take d mirror n see himself first....some says...just swallow the bitter thing and keep quiet...prove him u r not that bad as he think....huhuhuhu....its hard and hurt to be an open minded person and a positive thinkerz!

Now...i really blur...what i want in this life is to have a smart brain and smart look...i hope there is someone who really appreciate everything that God given to me...